In the memory of the departed

End of an era, this is how we sum up mentally when a loved one, especially somebody old, leaves us forever. A part of you leaves with the person who was a parent, an aunt, a husband, an uncle, a brother, a sister, a friend, with whom you might have shared most or a part of your life. Even if it is a natural death, can we let go easily?

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There will be none waiting at the door for a married daughter or son, calling up time and again ‘Kahan pahunche….. dhyan se aana..’; There ‘ll be no arguments when a mother would get scolded by her daughter, “ why did you say like this …. learn to be quite, aap apna khao piyo, maaza karo”, easier said than done though.

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How would the first visit to a home, which you called your own, be without someone eager to welcome you as a part of his/her blood? How would the first morning be without that ‘someone’ for others, but your ‘own’? How would you summon the courage to flip over belongings that remain behind?

The kitchen, the bedroom, the empty rocking chair, the open window, everything has an imprint. The way she tied her saree, the way she made her hair, meticulous matching of accessories with clothes, there might be so many non-essential details you might have missed in his or her lifetime, which only remain embedded lifelessly in photo albums and now in mobiles and pen drives. That physical space becomes vacant, there is a void in the heart waiting aimlessly to be filled.

We don’t treasure the traits of elders- love, wisdom, dignity, self-respect, constraint, self-discipline—in their lifetime, to be only left looking for glimpses in their successors. Loss of a loved one exposes human fallibility and importance of a relationship, which might have been a person’s lifeline, till a day or may be decade ago.


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